Calving

Calving number 1 appeared the other day. I was the only "large animal" vet around the place who was marginally free. Never mind that I'd booked an operation in just for me to do...but that's a different story.

I arrive to find a cow still in the shed with quite a few others, not at all separated. Suspicions that this was going to go badly started then. The suspicions were confirmed when the farmer asked why we needed to move her, and why we couldn't just get on with it in the shed.

Calving is a messy, painful and generally suboptimal time for all involved. This time is aided by proper restraint for the cow. Attempting to calve whilst the cow is allowed to run free is just asking for a broken arm.

The epidural went in fine. Tail floppy. Everything relaxed and easier to feel. There are feet. Tick! Ideal! And then a head appears. Tick! This shouldn't be too hard thinks me...bad mistake. Thought number 3 was "these feet feel a little small". Possibly twins. Sadly already deceased. Not too bad though, done this before. I can't trace the legs all the way back to the shoulder, my arms are too short. But there's a head right there, this all has to be the same calf right?

Wrong.

Somehow the calves were coming both at the same time. Calf 1 on top had head forward but legs all the way back. Calf 2 had legs forward, head all the way back. This made for a poor mix.

Thankfully help was at hand. I was rescued by another vet who was "just passing" and happened to see my car. She has longer arms and, more importantly, over 10 years experience doing this kind of thing. And she struggled too.

It was an OK outcome - the cow was still alive. Sadly the calves were dead. We were covered in bruises, sweat and blood, but that's just part of the job. Back to the practice for tea!